Tag Archives: Beijing

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A Sweet Series of Chinglishy Gift Fails

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Christmas wrapping paper always works well. Especially for Papa Pickles' belated birthday present... But the wrapping paper turned out to be a little more generic than we'd expected. And the greeting card, which Woo bought in Bangalore, turned out to have a rather unexpected adhesive. That's right, as in the maxi pads. At least we didn't have to ...

by Andy Deemer / 4 Comments
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Speaking of Revolution at The Beijing Police Museum

"Have you heard about the coup?" "Only that there may have been one." The Professor and I were making our way through Beijing's Police Museum, a few blocks from where a coup would have happened. We'd already broken the door of a fake interrogation cell, and almost knocked over a motorcycle. We shouldn't have been ...

by Andy Deemer / 2 Comments
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Two Chinese Beers The World Could Live Without

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Sitting in the back of my fridge, I just found a pair of abominations: lemon juice beer and pineapple flavor beer. Where they came from, god only knows. But it was time to get rid of them. Brewed in Beijing -- out in the chic and rural Shunyi, in fact -- the Yanjing-brand lemon ...

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Ain’t Eggs-actly McDonald’s

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New eggs from Jenny's seem a little McFamiliar.

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Steampunk, Eat Your Heart Out in the Basement of Beijing’s Printing Museum

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"There's nothing like that around here," said a shoe-repair man. Two waitresses laughed at us, and a woman selling onions gasped. "A watermelon museum?" she asked, "Really?" So we tried the Printing Museum instead. It was closed. The 12-foot-tall black doors, the entire four-floor building, was firmly locked. I'd read about a great statue of ...

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Hello Kitty Dreams, Hello Awesome Reality

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"You ever feel like you're stuck in a wind-up music box?" Michelle asked. The walls were pink. The waitresses were dressed as dolls. Piano keys tinkled softly. There were balloons and glitter and an off-season Christmas tree. We were trapped in a music box. That's how Hello Kitty wants you to feel. Welcome to Hello ...

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Sheep Placenta AIDS Soup

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Sure, every restaurant may have a maggot-filled dish called Insect Story, and what's a Chinese restaurant without a Jacopetti-inspired Monkey Head offering (even if it is just a bowl of fried mushrooms). I don't know, however, of a single other Beijing restaurant that boasts acquired immune deficiency syndrome sheep placenta soup. That's right: AIDS soup, the most ...

by Andy Deemer / 9 Comments
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Hello Kitty, Hello Beijing!

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Asia's newest Hello Kitty restaurant, Dreams Hello Kitty, may not be open yet, but it's getting reeeeeal close. We snuck inside for a few sweet pix before getting ousted... Looking AWESOME! As cool as Seoul's Hello Kitty Cafe... but with maid outfits!!! I just hope we'll get the sweet potato lattes, too! But sadly, I ...

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Creepy Statue in an Abandoned School (in a neighborhood that’s almost gone)

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Last week, DK and I stumbled on a strange abandoned school in northern Beijing. We were looking for the city's largest recycling center, but this mad statue was a far tastier find. Seven demonic babes, lounging, suckling, emerging from the concrete. "Can you imagine seeing this every day? As a kid?" It was strange. But ...

by Andy Deemer / 9 Comments
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Bizarre Beijing: CityWeekend’s Tribute to AsiaObscura

Maybe you missed it, but fresh on the heels of their coverage of our taxidermy efforts, the the October issue of CityWeekend was devoted to Bizarre Beijing! Of course their research ended in the pages of AsiaObscura. Heh heh. They recommend - the unmissably gory Daoist statues of Dongyue Temple - the quirk in miniature of ...

by Andy Deemer / 2 Comments
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Awesomely Steampunk Portable Corn Roaster

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Found this fellow in an alleyway behind my house the other day, roasting corn on the side of the road. "What's this machine called?" I asked. I was amazed, watching him flip the cobs from one tube to another, moving them closer and further from the flame below. Constantly he was rolling the tubes, handling ...

by Andy Deemer / 2 Comments
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CityWeekend Covers AO’s Taxidermy Efforts

Yesterday morning, I exploded with glee when I realized our Pyongyang Too book had been covered in the wonderful Drawn & Quarterly -- a whopping year ago! Now if that wasn't good enough, yesterday was also the release of the new issue of CityWeekend magazine, their back page a very fun article devoted to WooLand, me, ...

by Andy Deemer / 6 Comments
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Another Mind-Blowingly Incredible Menu

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After the insane Cultural Revolution restaurant menu, I didn't think I'd ever be impressed by mistranslated food titles again. Boy, was I wrong. Below are some of my new favorite dishes from our local duck restaurant. One dish wasn't mistranslated at all. And it's my favorite... spicy, awesome, and a weird unexpected ...

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Possibly the Best Menu of All Time

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Beijing's Cultural Revolution Restaurant has one of the most bizarre stage shows (video here) and some entirely inappropriate fashion statements, too, but it also has one of the worst best menus I've yet seen. Here are some of my favorite dishes... Classic, eh?

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On Horse Meat Sashimi

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It finally happened. We ordered the horse sashimi. "You want what?" said the waiter, unsure. "Horse meat," I slurred in Chinese, that last bottle of sake harming my already-poor pronunciation. "Raw horse meat." The waiter looked at WooLand, who wasn't listening, and then at me, and he finally shrugged and wrote it down. Clearly ...

by Andy Deemer / 6 Comments
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Beijing Supermarket Sells Crack, Aisle 4

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We haven't seen this Jingkelong supermarket sign ourselves, but reader Randi sent it in, adding, "Apparently, their marketing strategy is to appeal to customers at two different ends of the spectrum -- or maybe this is a brilliant plan to encourage people with a bad habit to try to offset its effects." Classic. ...

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Best Skirt in the Worst Spot Possible

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You may have seen my post about the Red Restaurant, where dancers, singers and audiences recreate and celebrate the years of famine and starvation of the Great Leap Forward, and the torture and slaughter of the Cultural Revolution. Something I left out was this lady. While many were dressed in the red guard dress of ...

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Return to Fake Disneyland? Sweeeeeet!

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This past weekend, AO hosted our third BeijingObscura outing: a return to the magnificent Copyright Infringement Park, aka Fake Disneyland! Thanks to everyone who made it--it wouldn't have been the same without you, and your absolute awesomeness!!!

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More GameSpot Logo-Theivery

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I found a flyer on the subway, for Beijing's "岭郡ONE: Tuscany Romantic life" apartment complex, units from 430 sq-ft. Clever... looked like an ipad. WAITASECOND!!! Is that Ethan O'Brien or James Cheung's GameSpot logo, promoting "No limit loans" (不限贷)??? Oh yeah, it is. Nice work, Chinese bootleggers! Reminds me of that sweet Wii-knockoff "Wü Music Kit" ...

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Disgusting Chinglish from a Tasty Buffet

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Not that many nights ago, WooLand and I were thrilled to be invited to one of the great linguistic banquets of the season. Government ministers, foreign diplomats, prominent magazine editors -- it was a real who's who of language and culture. And then we saw what was for dinner... Oh, boy... ...

by Andy Deemer / 3 Comments