Category Archives: Chinglish

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Toilet Cum Bath

toilet-cum-bath

All my morning rituals, in one handy place.

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Cooking With Poo

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Michelle picked this wonderful cookbook up off a shelf at Siam Paragon's Kinokuniya. I'm sure Poo is just her nickname. But what a great nickname it is. Oooh, it's on Amazon...

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Anus Dairy

anus-dairy

The dairy that keeps on giving. ("Party orders," too!)

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Antique Jews, Temple Jews, and even Plated Jews

Must be some of the lost tribes.

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Bangalore Restaurant Sells “Cunt Chick”

julie-chicken

Since moving to India, we've seen a lot of Julie. And this is what Julie saw offered in Koramangala today.

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On Eating “Old Beijing Fried Enema”

old-enema1

"Why not start today with a plate of freshly-fried old enema," I thought. It was bright, garish, and advertised on the wall. "It must be good." It wasn't. Dripping in oil and yet crispy enough to snap a molar, it tasted like a bad plate of pork cracklings. The dipping sauce -- chopped garlic in ...

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On Eating a Steaming Hot Bowl of Sweet AIDS Soup

aidsfood

"I'll have the AIDS soup," I said. It wasn't officially called AIDS soup. Not now. Shortly after I'd blogged about their deviant menus, the restaurant had crossed out every appearance of the word "AIDS" with a sharpie. Now it was simply "Strong Tibetan Sheep Placenta Nourishing Soup [XXXX]." Still a mouthful. But I'd had a few beers, ...

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Kakka-Style Meat, and More Uighur Menu Mishaps

cityheart0

Local Xinjiang menu doubles as undiscovered Situationist/Dada manifesto... All seen at 都市同心阁 (also known as "Concentric Urban Court" or "One-Hearted City Pavilion"), Gongti Beilu. Avoid the dodgy 串。

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Beijing Toilet Demands Seat Belts and Defence Masks, and Still Warns Against “Daop Down”

toiletwarnings2

He was desperate to cover all his bases. Or maybe this was just a really twisted shitter.

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A Sweet Series of Chinglishy Gift Fails

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Christmas wrapping paper always works well. Especially for Papa Pickles' belated birthday present... But the wrapping paper turned out to be a little more generic than we'd expected. And the greeting card, which Woo bought in Bangalore, turned out to have a rather unexpected adhesive. That's right, as in the maxi pads. At least we didn't have to ...

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Sheep Placenta AIDS Soup

aidsfood

Sure, every restaurant may have a maggot-filled dish called Insect Story, and what's a Chinese restaurant without a Jacopetti-inspired Monkey Head offering (even if it is just a bowl of fried mushrooms). I don't know, however, of a single other Beijing restaurant that boasts acquired immune deficiency syndrome sheep placenta soup. That's right: AIDS soup, the most ...

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Ear Fungus with Onions

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Trust Me, They're Better That Way The onions must help mask the ear fungus scent.

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No Panking!

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Not Just Pork Balls, But…

Dim sum offering, a few days back.

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Black Friday Special: Four Products You Shouldn’t Live Without

Trauma Relieving Spray Krack Clit A Free Shart

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Restaurant Rats

Seen at Xian's Hong Kong Star Restaurant. Or ratS tnaruatseR, as it is.

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Bad Fish, Worse Than Roofies

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Another Mind-Blowingly Incredible Menu

amazingmenu2

After the insane Cultural Revolution restaurant menu, I didn't think I'd ever be impressed by mistranslated food titles again. Boy, was I wrong. Below are some of my new favorite dishes from our local duck restaurant. One dish wasn't mistranslated at all. And it's my favorite... spicy, awesome, and a weird unexpected ...

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Possibly the Best Menu of All Time

cultmenu6

Beijing's Cultural Revolution Restaurant has one of the most bizarre stage shows (video here) and some entirely inappropriate fashion statements, too, but it also has one of the worst best menus I've yet seen. Here are some of my favorite dishes... Classic, eh?

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That’s just rubbish….

trash1

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