Category Archives: Chinglish

Chinglish / ,

This Bangalore Service Really Covers Everything

Take care of all your morning rituals, in one handy place…

toilet-cum-bath

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Chinglish / ,

You Won’t Believe This Incredible Thai Cookbook

We picked up this wonderfully fecal cookbook at Siam Paragon’s Kinokuniya.

cooking-with-poo

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Chinglish / ,

This City Market Dairy Really Needs a Better Name

The dairy that keeps on giving.

anus-dairy

/ by Dean Pickles / 2 Comments
Chinglish, Extraordinary Eats / ,

We Ate Beijing Enemas, So That You Didn’t Need To

“Why not start today with a plate of freshly-fried old enema,” I thought. It was bright, garish, and advertised on the wall. “It must be good.”

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Chinglish, Events, Extraordinary Eats / ,

On Eating a Steaming Hot Bowl of Sweet AIDS Soup

“I’ll have the AIDS soup,” I said.

It wasn’t officially called AIDS soup. Not now. Shortly after I’d blogged about their deviant menus, the restaurant had crossed out every appearance of the word “AIDS” with a sharpie. Now it was simply “Strong Tibetan Sheep Placenta Nourishing Soup [XXXX].”

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/ by Dean Pickles / 2 Comments
Chinglish / ,

What’s Going On Inside This Public Toilet?

He was desperate to cover all his bases.

Or maybe this was just a really twisted shitter.

/ by Dean Pickles / 2 Comments
Chinglish / , , ,

This is the Worst Wrapping Paper I’ve Ever Seen

Christmas wrapping paper always works well. Especially for Papa Pickles’ belated birthday present…

But the wrapping paper turned out to be a little more generic than we’d expected.

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/ by Dean Pickles / 4 Comments
Chinglish, Events, Extraordinary Eats / ,

AIDS Soup isn’t the Weirdest Thing at this Local Restaurant

Sure, every restaurant may have a maggot-filled dish called Insect Story, and what’s a Chinese restaurant without a Jacopetti-inspired Monkey Head offering (even if it is just a bowl of fried mushrooms).

I don’t know, however, of a single other Beijing restaurant that boasts acquired immune deficiency syndrome sheep placenta soup.

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/ by Dean Pickles / 9 Comments
Chinglish /

Ear Fungus with Onions

Trust Me, They’re Better That Way

The onions must help mask the ear fungus scent.

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Chinglish /

No Panking!

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Chinglish /

Not Just Pork Balls, But…

Dim sum offering, a few days back.

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Chinglish, Excellent Products / ,

Black Friday Special: Four Products You Shouldn’t Live Without

Trauma Relieving Spray

Krack

Clit

A Free Shart

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Chinglish / ,

Restaurant Rats

Seen at Xian’s Hong Kong Star Restaurant. Or ratS tnaruatseR, as it is.

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Chinglish /

Bad Fish, Worse Than Roofies

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Chinglish / ,

Another Mind-Blowingly Incredible Menu

After the insane Cultural Revolution restaurant menu, I didn’t think I’d ever be impressed by mistranslated food titles again. Boy, was I wrong.

Below are some of my new favorite dishes from our local duck restaurant.

One dish wasn’t mistranslated at all. And it’s my favorite… spicy, awesome, and a weird unexpected bone in the middle. Oh, yes….

As seen at JingZun Peking Duck Restaurant, No 6 Building Nouth [sic], Holiday Inn Express Opposite Chunxiu Road [sic], Chaoyang District, Beijing. 010-6417-4075.

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Chinglish / ,

Possibly the Best Menu of All Time

Beijing’s Cultural Revolution Restaurant has one of the most bizarre stage shows (video here) and some entirely inappropriate fashion statements, too, but it also has one of the worst best menus I’ve yet seen. Here are some of my favorite dishes…

Classic, eh?

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Chinglish / ,

That’s just rubbish….

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Chinglish / ,

Beijing Supermarket Sells Crack, Aisle 4

We haven’t seen this Jingkelong supermarket sign ourselves, but reader Randi sent it in, adding, “Apparently, their marketing strategy is to appeal to customers at two different ends of the spectrum — or maybe this is a brilliant plan to encourage people with a bad habit to try to offset its effects.” Classic.

膨化食品 (Pénghuà shípǐn) is actually just junk food. If you’re really looking for ready rocks, ask for “可卡因” (Kěkǎyīn).

/ by Dean Pickles / 1 Comment
Chinglish / ,

Disgusting Chinglish from a Tasty Buffet

Not that many nights ago, WooLand and I were thrilled to be invited to one of the great linguistic banquets of the season. Government ministers, foreign diplomats, prominent magazine editors — it was a real who’s who of language and culture. And then we saw what was for dinner… Oh, boy… Clearly, if the linguists can’t even get this right, chinglish has nothing to worry about.

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Chinglish / ,

Non-beach Things from Beijing’s Fake Beach

They’re strict about this….

They were out of this….

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